Jurassic Plot-Holes

I have mentioned briefly before that the original Jurassic Park film is by far my favourite film; from the very first I cowered behind the sofa aged 3 to watch it, Steven Speilberg’s dinosaur action flick has been rooted in my system and probably quite worryingly has influenced several of my life choices (witness my SUV obsession!). It’s one of those films I can recite word for word and with copies on VHS, DVD, Blu-Ray and on my laptop too it’s unlikely that I will ever be without a copy of the film.

That’s not to say it’s a film without flaws, and having read both books till the pages have fallen out I have long desired to see a longer, more graphic representation of Michael Crichton’s work on the big screen. Although Hollywood does seem obsessed with rebooting franchises and remaking films (often those which were rubbish in the first place!), the long drawn out saga of Jurassic Park is one I doubt we will see re-envisioned anytime soon…especially with the ever in-development JP4 (and possibly 5 and 6 afterwards). But whilst we have no idea about what the next sequel might involve-plotwise, anything remotely similar to the original wouldn’t really work. Why? Well here is a list of reasons of why the Jurassic Park franchise just would not work in 2013:

Mobile Phones: Once things start to go wrong in the park and the visitors call for help, Nedry’s tampering means that they are unable to do so. Any film set in the present day would have to deal with the fact that nearly everyone carries a mobile (I suspect even Alan Grant would). Sure they could have something about being out of range of signal, but it seems pretty unlikely that an audience would not question it.

Modems: Since the phones are out, the old-fashioned modems are crashed too and so the group are unable to use the internet to get hope either. Any modern theme park/resort which relies so heavily on technology would have multiple back ups to ensure that their systems remain connected at all times-I doubt even Nedry would cut himself off from the outside world like that.

Social Networking: A free trip to Costa Rica? Even if the adults had not spoken about their weekend before they left I am sure Lex and Tim would have. And who is to say that nobody else would have talked? Things can go viral pretty quickly.

Google Earth: Google updates their maps pretty often…Google themselves and anyone else looking would spot that something is up-even if InGen managed to get their satellite images blurred.

Internet forums: Similar to social networking it does not take much for an internet rumour to take siege. Anybody involved directly with the development of the Park would have to had sign a non-disclosure agreement, but those on the periphery may start to leak information, or at least seek out others who might have more information.

Electric cars: Ok maybe not something that would ruin the plot of the film, but self-driven cars like the Explorers in the film are now a reality (at least for Google’s test drivers). Pretty sure there awe would be lost slightly in the process.

Airbags: Again whilst we are on the subject of cars, any T Rex attacking visitors would be met by a barrage of airbags and other safety features which were just not present in 90’s cars. The Lost World touched on this slightly when the Mercedes ML featured met it’s fate, but nowhere near on the same level.

 

Sorry this post seems to be abit sporadic…it started off as a bit of a daydream one evening and I’ve been distracted by Emmerdale whilst writing it (the shame), my bad! But you get the point, alot of films just wouldn’t work given a contemporary reboot

 

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